Anchor.

#anchor #beingthereforeveryone #selfishpeople #people #nicepeople #NO

Anchor.

I never wanted my pain and struggle to make me a victim. Neither did I want my battles to make me someone else’s hero. My survival stories are at times scary... none the less … have always wanted people to benefit.

There is although a flip side of being a nice person…

People in general are vey selfish… they are very limited to their own needs… They are not always going to be there for you… but will expect you to be there when they need you! This has led to the realization that I should probably stop being available for everyone always. It only leads to disappointment.

A big reason why I am used to being nice to all… in spite of being avoided…. But have replied or offered help the moment asked for…. Is … my background… the good people who have told me to do so always… the elders… the sisters back in Carmel School…… but I guess they never took into consideration that the world has selfish people also… that there are people who mess with you in your head and want you to make them your priority… but will never do the same for you.. !!!!

I find it difficult to deal with these type of people… who are always putting you down… for no apparent reason.. giving you a silent treatment… again for no apparent reason….. and dismissing your feelings…. For GOD knows what reasons…. The same people who probably once have promised to be by your side ….. I find it difficult to understand how … HOW a person can contradict one own self … without feeling a pang !!! a dash of guilt… !!!

These are the people who will poison your spirit… and these are the people who are very difficult to get rid of… from the back of your mind…

These are the people from whom you just cannot cancel your subscription to their issues…. they stay on at some corner of your heart and keep on meddling with your peace of mind.... No matter how much you try not keep them away...

All because you have a soft heart…. A criteria which is extremely harmful for survival…

Here I feel something is very wrong with me… I am not fit for people…

Also, I have always been afraid to loosing people I care for…people I love… But… now.. I wonder… if there is anyone out there afraid to lose me…. The answer is a BIG NO…

So… I guess… Its better to have nobody than to have someone who is half there… ALMOST not there… or simply doesn’t want to be there.

A big NO to help others Policy.

A big NO to being an anchor for others…

Sometimes you don’t realize you’re actually drowning when you’re the anchor for everyone.. and there is nobody to hold you up… Nobody to rescue you….

Its entirely

I vs. I….

Me vs. Me…